when did i lose myself again?
when did my head go under water?
when did i let it overtake me?
i'm not treading.
i'm fully submerged.
i'm alone.
"and ill stand up- and i keep my mouth shut"
i don't believe it.
i don't believe He loves me.
i don't believe He is here.
Where are you.
Where is He?
You tell me He is in me and around me.
You're right, my head knows it.
You're right- i've felt it before.
He doesn't seem good anymore.
He doesn't seem good.
And i seem alone.
Everything is wrong.
Don't ask me what I want.
Don't ask me what I need.
I don't care. I just need Him here.
I'd like a week of sleep.
Then to wake up on an Island with Jesus and have Him hold me as I weep.
I try to push it away.
Laugh with my friends.
Smile.
How are you? I'm good. How are you?
How are you doing? Fine. How are you?
Try harder. Try harder.
This is when I run.
This is when i run.
Come find me God.
I don't care- I just need you here.
I can't think past this night- tomorrow overwhelms me.
You can't understand.
And neither can I.
There's something that happens in any other place.